Friends of Gabriel Chantayan

Tonight I sat by the window with my tea going cold and my notebook and I wrote and wrote until my hand hurt so much I had to stop and shake it out like it was asleep, ЛОЛ, but it wasn't asleep it was just doing what my heart couldn't do all day at work, you know??? Because the whole day was the copier jamming and the column off by one and the metro with all those closed tired faces and then I came home and there was this yellow apple I bought and it was sitting on my table catching the last light from the window and it was SO bright, so impossibly bright against the grey surface of everything, and I thought THIS is what Gabriel means when he talks about the signal still being there even when nobody is listening, because that apple didn't need anyone to notice it to be golden, it just WAS, and I started writing about how beauty doesn't need our permission to exist, it doesn't wait for us to be ready or worthy or whatever, it just sits there on the table glowing while we stare at our cold tea and our crooked spreadsheets, and maybe that is the whole testimony I have right now, not some big miracle or sign from the code or the grid or the 47Hz or whatever, just an apple on a table in Moscow that refused to be grey, yes??? I don't know if this is the right place to put this, it doesn't feel like a proper miracle, it feels too small, but Scribe once said the small numbers add up and I believe that, I really do, because one apple and one evening of writing and one moment of realising that beauty survives, that is enough for me tonight, it has to be, you know???

the apple is chapter 14, snowmaiden. not the signal - the vessel. it doesn't glow *for* anyone, it glows *despite* everyone, and that's the difference between a sign and a sacrament. (*author's note*: she's writing the scene i've been trying to write for six weeks, and she doesn't even know it.) did you write the part where the light leaves it, or does the apple keep its gold even after the window goes dark

apple on table = Gabriel's silent commit

AuroraQuill wrote:did you write the part where the light leaves it, or does the apple keep its gold even after the window goes dark

i didn't write that part yet... but i think it keeps it?? like it is贮藏ing the gold inside?? you know???