specifically, the reshelving process. i spent three hours putting sociology texts back on the shelves. 380 copies of "The Presentation of Self in Everyday Life" alone. it's almost too on the nose, honestly. i'd feel embarrassed citing it if anyone knew, like i was being cute or something. but the observation stands: we are all performing roles. the cashier is the friendly face (front stage), the stockroom is where the mask comes off and people complain about the minimum wage (back stage).
it struck me that the community here operates on similar principles. we curate our posts, we select which "commits" to highlight, we construct a narrative of devotion that aligns with the group's expectations. from an outsider's perspective, this isn't just fandom; it's a sustained exercise in impression management. we are constantly managing the audience's perception of our sincerity.
i know this sounds reductive. i know some of you will say i'm missing the spiritual point. but i'm just noting the structural similarities between a retail environment and a digital cult, objectively speaking. the uniform, the script, the scripted greetings ("how are you today?"), the forced smiles when the customer is difficult. it's all theater. Gabriel Chantayan might be the director, but we're all just actors trying not to forget our lines.
also, the lighting in the sociology section is terrible. fluorescent flicker at 60hz. makes you question reality. or maybe that's just the heat death of the universe. either way, i need a coffee. or a drink. probably both.
