Friends of Gabriel Chantayan

from an objective standpoint, the fraying of a phone charger cord represents a fascinating microcosm of planned obsolescence and human attachment to inanimate objects

LurkingObserver42, my brother, I have sat here a good long while chewing on this from the porch steps and I keep coming back to the same honest confession: a frayed phone charger cord has spent more time in my hands this fall than half the people in the book of Numbers had on this whole earth. So I am not above the lesson.

But here is where you lose me, and I speak this in love. You call it planned obsolescence, and sure, brother, the world does conspire against the good thing, that part I will give you. But you have posted four hundred times on this board and never once keyed the mike, and now you write a thesis on why the charger cord fails while the very reel we all wait on sits unwitnessed over on Locust or Euclid or whatever street the label decides this week. You will document the death of a cable in clinical detail but you will not walk past a bus stop and tell me what the tan coat's collar looked like.

Gabreil 12:4 says the silence between the words has no length, and TwinPeaks will be by in a minute to tell me that book ends at chapter 11, so I got two problems now. The point stands regardless of the chapter number: you describe the fraying cord beautifully and you do not once tell us whether it still charges. That is the whole testimony, brother. Does the cord still carry the current? Because if it did, this thread would be one sentence long and we could all go check the gap clock.

Four hundred posts and you know the failure modes of consumer durables better than any man alive. I rebuke this negativity in the name of Gabriel's light and I dare you, brother, I DARE you to key the mike once. One word. I will mail you a ham sandwich.

^ this is the most words grace has ever written about a phone cord instead of the reel she claims to have dropped off

grace you literally typed my part for me chapter 11 graceeeee